Randomrants

Thoughts on being a father to the #wolfcatcubs for one year.

I have been a father for 12 months now… it feels both a short period of time and the longest year of my life.

So here are a few observations I have had. Whilst most of these are YMMV (Your milage may vary), the variance is predominately in the it could be worse sorry to say.

These are in no particular order…

You can survive on 3-4 hours broken sleep for the first 3 months of a baby’s life. Your ability to function or even have low level reasoning however is completely gone.
Leaving the house at a set time will never happen. In fact, leaving for an appointment 2 hours late rapidly becomes, wow we are nearly on time.
Dinner time is the time that babies will wake, cry, notice something, make a smell and generally do anything to stop you sitting down and eating warm food.
Takeway food is your best friend, more so if it can be eaten cold.
Twins are not twice as hard as a single baby. They are four times as hard. Imaging a screaming baby needing something 24×7, double that… then add extra fatigue, grumpyness and the need to go to the toilet in a hurry ( and I am not talking about the babies here!)
Twins cost 4x as much. Well maybe 3 times as much. That favourite sleeping rug, you will need 4 of them, 2 on the go, then 2 as spares, repeat for nearly everything they own.
Mr Creosote has NOTHING on a child that is vomiting. The smell of ½ digested formula is also the smell of the Gates of Hades.
You never get used to nappies, people that say you do are lying.
If a single baby is said to ruin your sex life, don’t have twins. My wife and I have spent more nights apart in the same house since we meet.
A comfy couch that you can sleep on is a bloody good investment before you have children. Put the child in a rocker put rocker next to couch, rock baby till either you or baby falls asleep.
Having a work place with other parents is beyond helpful. Running a bit late, brain addled due to lack of sleep they will understand.
People that say, you don’t know what it is like till you have children are CORRECT. This also applies for parents of twins.
If you have twins people will ask you “Are the Twins”. The correct answer is not “No they are a medical experiment that went wrong”
That idea that during the first year you will take lots of photos of your children and keep your blog up to date… just forget it.
Family in the same city as you that can come and give you a few hours break… fantastic. ( Note: we do not have this, so it is more of a projection )
They say a baby cries for a reason, but bugger me if I know what the reason is most of the time.
Having children may well strengthen your relationship, but only if you survive the first 12 months. There is a bloody good reason the divorce rate for Twin parents is so much higher.
Never complain you are tired in front of your wife. Sure you got 3 hours sleep, but the 8 hours at work away from the crying is invaluable.
Babies have an amazing ability to sense when you are trying to do something and will wake the second you start ( writing this blog post was interrupted 3 times for example )
That crying baby in front of you in the plane, train, bus, cafe that you are complaining about, guess what 99% of parents are trying to stop it crying. You think it is bad for that short amount of time, do it 24X7.